Hi everyone! I had very good feedback in my last advice column so I decided to write another one with a few of your questions. If you want to participate in future blog posts like this, make sure to follow my Instagram (21daysapp), because I always post on my stories when I’m about to write an advice column and you can share there your questions.
Anyway, let’s get started with the advice:
- Hi Kati, I was just wondering what inspires you creatively and how you focus on creative blocks.
I feel like when it comes to creativity, the best thing you can probably do for yourself is to take breaks. When you put so much pressure on yourself to be creative and to find new ideas and inspiration, I think it does the opposite. You’re stressing to find these things and most of the time you get the best ideas in the most random moments when you’re not actually thinking about it, like when you’re in a shower, when you’re about to sleep, and so on.
What inspires me creatively is probably the creative people that I have in my life and that I follow on social media. I find a lot of inspiration from books, podcasts, and Pinterest mostly. Just know that it’s okay if you’re not always super creative and full of ideas, that’s not really realistic.
- How can I make genuine friendships when I have extreme social anxiety?
I have been there, my social anxiety used to be really bad. So I definitely feel you. I know it’s so hard to create good friendships when you have anxiety because you want friendships but the idea to get out there and actually meet new people it’s really scary.
One thing that you have to realize is that all of these thoughts you have in your head of how people are perceiving you are just all only in your head. Another thing you need to know is that the more you start opening up and reaching out to people the easier it gets. Believe me. The first time you do it it’s really scary and it’s really hard but in these moments think to yourself: “What’s the worst that can happen?”. Asking yourself that question is really helpful. Honestly, what’s the worst thing that can happen if someone doesn’t want to be your friend? Their lost. Start with small steps, for example when you pass to someone give them a little compliment, open the door for someone, ask the cashier about their day,.. . These are small acts but they can build so much self-confidence.
- How to deal with feeling behind socially since I don’t like to go to parties in college?
Not everyone is a super big party person. Some people think that partying is essential to have a great experience in high school or college but that’s not the case for everyone. If you don’t care about partying that’s fine, that’s not the only thing that creates your school experience. There are other things that can make a great experience and it’s kind of what you want out of it. Join an organization or club that interests you. Introduce yourself to the person sitting next to you in class. Give someone a compliment. Be authentic, be you.
- What’s your advice on living your best “hot girl summer”?
Everyone’s version of a hot girl summer is different. Some people are completely off during the summer but some other people still have to work. But my general advice for living your best hot girl summer life is to plan fun things to do. Make a bucket list, and write down fun things that you can do that are doable. And that doesn’t mean that you’ve to go on this really big vacation. You can still have such a fun summer even if you’re in your hometown or if you’re not traveling. Plan a cute picnic with your friends, go for a lake or beach day, go on a road trip, have a sleepover with your friend, watch the sunset or sunrise, go boating, visit a museum, the ideas are endless. It’s the little things that just make life so exciting. Become the best version of yourself, have self-care days, and surround yourself with positive people that inspire you and make you feel good.
- Do you have advice for accepting being single while everyone around me is dating?
My best advice is to love your life while you’re alone because when you add a partner into the equation, your life will change, you won’t have as much time for yourself, and you will sometimes have to compromise and give up certain parts. Because with relationships, comes a bit of sacrifice and in a way, that’s kind of the best part of being single. You don’t have to think about someone else, you make your own decisions, you do whatever you want, and that freedom can be so nice! And with this, I’m not saying that you will not have freedom in a relationship, because if you don’t, is not a good sign. But at the same time, it’s a different kind of freedom because you’re always taking into account the other person’s feelings. Just know that your single time is precious. Is such a good time to explore yourself. To explore what you like or don’t, trying different things and you don’t have to think about someone else’s feelings or thoughts and opinions.
- How to feel genuinely happy with where you are in life?
You got to enjoy the little moments because you’ll never be truly fulfilled if you’re only looking forward to the next big thing, the next big event, the next big trip. Those moments don’t come super often and if you’re constantly waiting for that, all the in-between time you just think that your life is boring, but it’s not! I think once you start to appreciate the little things and little moments in your everyday life it’s really amazing. So, even if you are in an era of life where you’re still trying to figure things out, this is just one chapter of your life and as hard as it is sometimes you just have to enjoy all the chapters before they’re over because no chapter lasts forever, it’s human nature work.
That’s all for today! I really hope you enjoyed this post. If you need some advice feel free to share your questions below or on my Instagram. And thank you to all the people who participate in these posts 🙂
See you next week. Sending you all the love and good vibes ❤️